Have you ever been caught off guard by something small? Anunexpected comment in a meeting, a sideways glance, an unexpected question, and suddenly felt yourself wobble a bit inside? Maybe your stomach tightened, your face flushed, or you wanted to retreat into silence or react in a way that surprised you? It happens to all of us.
Those moments often say more about us than the incident itself. They tugat a thread of old stories, insecurities, or expectations we carry. If we’re not paying attention, we can get pulled completely out of alignment with who we really are.
This is when we need to get curious.
Instead of judging ourselves for how we react, we can pause and check in with
three key elements of our experience: sensation, emotion, and thought.
Sensation: What’s happening in the body right now? Tightness in thechest, shallow breathing, tingling in the hands? These signals are often the first clue that something has touched us deeply.
Emotion: What feelings are showing up alongside those sensations? Maybe it’s embarrassment, anger, or fear. Emotions are the energy behind our reactions.
Thought: What story is running through the mind? Perhaps “They don’trespect me,” or “I should’ve done better.” Thoughts often fuel or magnify the emotion.
Balance and alignment
When all three are in balance, we can see more clearly whether we’re aligned
with our values and truth. But when one element becomes dominant, we lose
perspective:
If sensation is strongest, we may get swept up in physical discomfort and react
before we’ve even named the feeling.
If emotion is strongest, our intensity can drown outreason, leaving us stuck in anger or sadness.
If thought is strongest, we might spin stories that pull us away from what’s
really happening in the moment.
And if one of these elements is absent, like we’re blocking off from emotion or
ignoring the body, we’re missing information about our state of alignment.
Curiosity about all three gives us a fuller picture.
It lets us notice the connections: how a racing heart pairs with worry, or how
a calm breath can soften a sharp thought. With practice, this check-in becomes
a way back to ourselves.
This takes practice
You don’t need to start in the heat of the moment. Often, it can be easier to begin with something that’s already happened. Look back at a conversation or an incident and bring your curiosity there:
* What did I feel in my body?
* What emotions were strongest?
* What thoughts kept looping in my mind?
Exploring a past moment builds the habit of checking in without pressure. Then,
when life does catch you off guard, it’s easier to slip into this practice
naturally. Over time, it becomes almost instinct, like reaching for your
balance when you trip.
Alignment doesn’t mean we never get rattled
It means that when we do, we know how to come back into alignment. It gives us
a flexible strength that’s rooted enough to stay grounded, yet supple enough to
bend when life doesn’t go the way we expect.
When you’re curious about sensation, emotion, and thought, you’ll start to see
the small signals that tell you whether you’re centered or drifting. Over time,
this practice builds resilience. You don’t need to armor up or hide. You don’t
need to react in ways you’ll regret. Instead, you can show up as your true self,
aware, steady, and grounded.
Curiosity is not just about knowing more about the world. It’s about knowing
more about ourselves. And in that knowing, we find a kind of quiet power that
can’t be shaken by someone else’s noise.
Try this
Think of a moment today that unsettled you. Replay it gently and walk yourself with
curiosity through the three elements:
Sensation: What did your body feel?
Emotion: What feelings came with those sensations?
Thought: What story did your mind create?
Notice how these three weave together, and ask: If I had seen this in the
moment, how might I have responded differently?
The more you practice, the easier it becomes to check in right when you need it
without pressure, just an aware presence.